March 10, 2003
Yesterday, after reading my entry, a friend took this photograph and emailed it to me:
(click on image for the full-size version)
So simple - just a candle in a Chinese-style holder - but so symbolic.
Now there's a tiny little light in a universe of darkness.
We naturally focus our eyes on the light and it will grow, in substance and in importance.
That photo means a lot to me, not only because someone took the time and trouble to create it.
It means that someone understands.
Yes, I've been through a bad time but I see hope now. I see my own light shining through.
Alvin isn't the only one who understands. The e-mail mentioned in a previous entry relayed a similar message in words.
Since then I've received gifts of love from friends who are close and from friendly acquaintances.
Several of the messages say things like, "I know I can't make it better but here is my experience and I hope it comforts you to know you are not alone in your feelings."
It must have been difficult for those people to write about their own tragedies. I am honoured that they did that for me.
And while they can't make it better in the literal sense, they do make it better, somehow.
Collectively, it makes a difference.
Friends like Stephanie, who are constantly there whether or not I'm having a crisis; and friends who have come when I called saying "I need you now."
Acquaintances who have dipped into their own pain in an effort to make mine bearable.
It is bearable, now. I think (hope?) I'm over the worst, aside from a few difficult days like anniversaries. And I am going to write about other things now that other things are in my head too.
So once more thank you, those who contacted me and those who sent positive thoughts. This has been difficult but it could have been much much worse.
Graphics courtesy of